Dear Life

Dear Life,

I have given it a thought.
A long deep conversation to my self, self reflecting sometimes with tears ( a bit). I am being too crazy emotional nowadays. It felt too overwhelming at times. Mental health is so important, never under estimate your judgement and self care.

Personal Life
I'm definitely need to step up my game (easy said than done). Honestly, even at 34 years old I basically don't know what am I doing with my life. I have a good life, I am! I live a healthy life, I don't smoke, don't do drugs, never convicted any crime (serious crime - if laughing at a friend consider as crimes then I am guilty as charged)  but other than that, I am good. But seriously, I have to settle down get married and build a family on my own (don't laugh). I know I don't talk about this very frequently, most of the time I don't. My mom thought I don't even bother at all about being still single at 34 years old so she's continuously and consistently lecturing me on that. 

I do think about it, I just don't say it out loud.
I walk around like everything is totally fine, but deep down inside my shoe, my sock is SLIDING off.

I am partly at fault, despite having met with Mr.Selfish, Mr.Younobetterthanme, or Mr.Player. Yes this time around I will give it a better consideration. No one is perfect, I know that but to be in a relationship it requires full commitment from both partners. It needs two to tango right? 

Professional Life

I am struggling to be honest. I am very proud with my achievement though, I would say that I had exceed any expectations. I give it my best to my working life I would say, but not all people will appreciate you for all the hard works and achievements you strive (even for them).That's why I am considering to move on for a better future, better mental health. I can't be helping everyone else but getting all the blame when things don't go with their way. No one is capable in doing ten (10) people work load at once and still surviving. It's not healthy and I am decided not going to do that anymore. Take in-charge of your shits and I'll do mine. I can't be running around saving everyone else without drowning on my own. At least give me credits for that (which I don't get it too). So yes, it is time for a new future.

Take care.